Facebook. Let’s discuss.
I didn’t really dig it at first. They sort of offended me, actually. I no longer had a university email address and was thus not eligible the first time I tried. I think I had only graduated about a year ago, so Facebook became to me the younger bitchy sorority girl of social media. I was all, back to myspace, if I’m too fucking old for you already. They’ve of course since widely expanded their membership or whatever you want to call it, and I do in fact like its simpler appearance and whatnot. At first it just seemed like a duplication of the people I’d run into on myspace, but last week I found a bunch of girls I met and shared a bathroom with during our freshman years at OU.
It really doesn’t seem like it’s been 10 whole years, which may be why I call them girls instead of women. Probably because I didn’t keep in touch with any of them. As much fun as we had on the top, un-air conditioned floor of the Virgin Vault (ha), as it was called for being the biggest female dormitory on campus, I only stayed two quarters before heading back to finish school closer to home. I felt like a goob for doing so, because it wasn’t academics that prompted me to do this. I had boy troubles, plus my grandmother passed away, plus my sister was ill. I was fucking depressed, even though my grades weren’t that bad. They weren’t great, but I wasn’t on academic probation or anything, just on the edge of getting weeded out from my first choice of major if I didn’t buckle down quickly. I hadn’t declared a major yet, and wasn’t anywhere near sure what I really wanted to study anyway, yada yada yada, so I came back home, worked a restaurant job for a quarter, and finally got my poop in enough of a group to go back to school at the local lower-cost university and resume distracting myself with a fresh new asshole boyfriend. It’s like they grew on trees or something.
Anyway, when I found the Jeff Hall dorm girls on Facebook, I was not at all surprised that every single one of them finished school and went on to do some rather cool shit. Some have been married, at least one divorced, some single, some engaged, but what struck me is that not a single one of them have kids or even is pregnant yet. That’s the polar opposite of my high school reunion. I know of the link between education and postponing having kids, but it was still somewhat comforting to realize I’m truly not behind the curve on that, even though it usually feels like it. I keep getting told that you can never really be “ready” to have kids, but I am getting close to the age that if I want to have more than one and not have them one on top of the other, we should start soon. Ish. That’s from the medical standpoint. Chances are just better for things to go well sooner than later. I really psyched myself out after the miscarriage. We weren’t at all in a hurry then, weren’t “trying,” simply being naive newlyweds, that if it happened we’d be happy about it – not realizing that if and when it didn’t work out, just how unhappy a situation it would be. From the financial standpoint, there’s still plenty of reason to wait. We finally paid off the bill from the pointless ultrasound and the repeated blood draws. You know the healthcare system is fundamentally broken when people lose everything to fight an illness and soldiers come home from war to inadequate care, but it also shouldn’t cost a couple thousand dollars to lose a barely established pregnancy when you have relatively decent, employer-provided health insurance. It didn’t break us financially or anything, but it still broke my heart. I made Mike start paying the bills. If they hadn’t offered interest-free financing (woohoo) I’d have paid it off with a credit card to avoid either of us having to write that specific fucking check every month.
Hmm. I started this with a couple of ideas in mind. A logical conclusion still eludes me, though I’m obviously not still talking about Facebook. Insert segue to this awesome birthday cake (via cakewrecks):
I think 29 will be a good age for me.