What the hell, one for the road!

[also, I find it hilarious that these videos are apparently FUELED BY RAMEN this week or whatever.  Times really are tough all over.]

Very Mean Girls.

I’m in the business of misery let’s take it from the top
She’s gotta body like an hour glass that’s ticking like a clock
it’s just a matter of time before we all run out
but when I thought he was mine she caught him by the mouth

I waited eight long months she finally set him free
I told him I couldn’t lie he was the only one for me
two weeks and we had caught on fire
she’s got it out for me but i wear the biggest smile

No, I never meant to brag… but i got him where i want him now.
Oh it was never my intention to brag… to steal it all away from you now
But God does it feel so good cause I got him where I want him now
if you could then you know you would
cause God it just feels so…
It’s just feels so good.

Second chances they don’t ever matter, people never change
Once a whore you’re nothing more and you know that will never change
and about forgiveness, we’re both supposed to have exchanged.
sorry honey but i passed it up, now look this way

Well, there’s a million other girls that do it just like you
looking as innocent as possible to get to who they want and what they like
it’s easy if you do it right
well i refuse, i refuse, i refuse.

No, I never meant to brag… but i got him where i want him now.
Oh it was never my intention to brag… to steal it all away from you now
But God does it feel so good to take it all away from you now
if you could then you know you would
cause God it just feels so…
It’s just feels so good.

I watched his wildest dreams come true
Not one of them involving you
Just watch my wildest dreams come true
Not one of them involving…

(lyrics via)

Good Times

Springfield.  Ahh, memories.  We did drive by the old house.  It’s adorable.  Weirdly adorable.  Also stopped into the jewelry store where we bought our wedding bands.  Totally surreal.  Saddens me when the first question for small talk is “are you still working?”  Crazy…lucky?  Whatever.  I couldn’t tell if she meant, do you still have a job? or, are you at home with babies yet?  So I had no idea whether to be…insulted or…grateful?  Hah.  Anyway, the baubles are all cleaned and polished, and I hatched a plan to get a battery in a watch that’s been sitting for ages unworn.  Then we went to a sweet sixteen party for Mike’s friend’s daughter.  Also adorable.  Bonus adorable…seven-week-old baby!  So mellow.  Crashed on my belly, barely started at the SURPRISE!!!  Too sweet.  No wailing noises, all afternoon.  Amazing.

Sooo.  Now what?  I know.

[image hat tip to Bazarov]

And then that happened….

Or I’m just paranoid.  Probably that.  But whatever.  It’s not as though I can just CHANGE at the drop of a handful of pins and needles and magically become a private person.  I surely ought…but…I obviously have a lot to say of late, so perhaps I’ll start wanting to come out and say at least some of it if I build some walls.  Perhaps temporary walls, but load bearing all the same.  Hopefully.  We shall see  Hmm…today I laughed at…oh yes!  I think it was today, anyhow.  Analogies.

From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.

I can’t pick a favorite…will let the Mad Men instruct.  They make it so easy.  Oh yes.  And this is what I wore to work today:

[picture to be inserted when I’m a little less lazy.  so probably never.]

…stalk me again whilst I’m walking and I will cut your fucking Jacobs off.  Unfortunately I have places to be and shit…or I’d take the time to dick around with whatever silliness this is all about.  Le sigh.  So yes…anybody I’m leaving out that should not be left out probably knows where to find me if they really care that much.  Or someone who does.  Creeeeepy.  Like when Jeopardy is all wrong.

Stick It Where Some Sun Shines!

But where?

During the election season or shortly thereafter, I somehow signed some petition or in some way got on an email list for ColorofChange.org. I’m not a black voter, but I consider myself an ally of all voters (unless you vote against my person. Okay, bad joke). At some point they sent me an email to fill out this little form to get my FREE sticker. FREE? You got me. The other day this showed up in the mail:

Adorable and awesome.

I don’t think I want to put it on my car, just because it’s not at all weather-proofed, and I’d hate to watch the image fade. It makes me wistful for the days of spiral notebooks and the like. But I love it, and it was FREE. So where do I stick it? I want to put it somewhere sure to grate on certain Republicans’ nerves, teehee. I’m thinking maybe on one of the cabinets in the garage? I dunno. So again, suggestions welcome! Suggestions still welcome for the title of this blog, too. I suppose I should come up with a few options and then maybe put it to a vote. It’ll be a three-way tie, one vote per choice.

How Gauche

I’ve never been an Oscar-party type; I like fashion, but…. This is the first time I remember seeing them actually put the phrase “So and so is wearing whatshis/herface” at the bottom of the screen like it’s breaking news. I can see it being cool for the up-and-coming, yet-to-be-expensive designers who can talk someone – who they know will be on camera – into wearing one of their designs, but Armani and de la Renta hardly need free advertising. Shit, maybe they have to pay for their name in lights. Ironic?

The Bionic Ion

I love my ‘plastic car,’ as Mike calls it. I have one of those Saturn Ions, the commercials for which used to feature the kid whacking the door panel with the baseball and/or bat, the shopping cart save, etc. During his journey to attempt the oil change, he fishtailed the rear end into one of the massive and towering frozen snow pyramids that seasonally adorn our parking lots in these parts. No dent, no scratched paint.

Now, if we can just get the oil changed.

Of course he apologized for yelling, and of course I quit folding laundry. Spoiled.

Is it completely lame to get your brother a gift card for his birthday? Dudes like to shop, if it’s free, right? Best Buy?