The subject line was FW: A funny one. I regret to report that I am apparently humorless this morn. Perhaps especially regarding in-law email.
A man was sick and tired
of going to work every day
while his wife stayed home.He wanted her to see what he wentthrough so he prayed:‘Dear Lord:I go to work every day and putin 8 hours while my wifemerely stays at home.I want her to know whatI go through.So, please allow her body toswitch with mine for a day.
God, in his infinite wisdom,granted the man’s wish..The next morning, sure enough,the man awoke as a woman…He arose, cooked breakfastfor his mate,Awakened the kids,
Set out their school clothes,Fed them breakfast,Packed their lunches,Drove them to school,Came home and pickedup the dry cleaning,Took it to the cleanersAnd stopped at the bankto make a deposit,
Went grocery shopping,Then drove home to putaway the groceries,
Paid the bills and balancedthe check book.He cleaned the cat’s litter boxand bathed the dog..Then, it was already 1 P.M.And he hurried to make the beds,Do the laundry, vacuum,Dust, And sweep and mopthe kitchen floor.Ran to the school to pick upthe kids and got into an argumentwith them on the way home.Set out milk and cookies andgot the kids organized to dotheir homework.Then, set up the ironing boardand watched TV while hedid the ironing.At 4:30 he began peelingpotatoes and washingvegetables for salad,breaded the pork chopsand snappedfresh beans for supper.
After supper,He cleaned the kitchen,Ran the dishwasher,Folded laundry,Bathed the kids, And putthem to bed.At 9 P.M. He was exhaustedand, though his daily choresweren’t finished, he went tobed where he was expected tomake love, which he managedto get through without complaint.
The next morning, he awokeand immediately knelt by thebed and said: –Lord, I don’t know whatI was thinking.I was so wrong to envy mywife’s being able to stayhome all day.Please, Oh! Please,let us trade back.. Amen!’
The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, replied:
‘My son, I feel you havelearned your lesson andI will be happy to changethings back to the waythey were.You’ll just have to waitnine months, though.You got pregnant last night.’
Nine months? Eat me. Try four years, and get no baby.
Meh. I suppose I am just raw and salty from spending the evening last night with happy parent friends. I try not to be jealous. It’s not reasonable. It’s not useful. It’s not fun, sometimes, though. I get that it’s obviously going to be the main topic of conversation, and I obviously do really enjoy their company or I wouldn’t be friends with them. They just make it look so effing easy it makes me feel incredibly inadequate and envious. Other people’s shoes and all, I guess. I’m sure it’s not easy. Nobody’s life is easy if you’re the one living it, I’m quite sure. We’d not be able to relate to each other at all if some people had it that easy. I just was tired from a long week working and didn’t really want to chat about kids all night. And really, we probably actually didn’t. Those are just the parts of the conversations I can’t wipe out of my brain right now. COMPLY, BRAIN! Oh, I see. You require coffee. I can’t argue with that.